The Crash
by Quiet.crash
Summary: Gilbert has never been good with words. Figures it would bring him only troubles. Human!AU Pairings: PruCan, Spamano, GerIta. Oneshot. Rating for a little of blood, just in case, and some swearing, not bad.


I was just leaving. I started my car and almost got to the end of the driveway when I saw it. That red car speeding right towards the people on the pavement. And they were not just random people - it was my brother, Feliciano, his brother, Antonio, Francis with his cousin and my beloved former boyfriend Matthew, and Matt's twin brother Alfred.

Why former? We had an argument. I fucked things up. I... told him about my past and choose the worst way to tell him about my previous relationships with Elizaveta and Roderich that I've had before we got together. I admit it sounded like I still do love them like I had.

Do I? Of course not! They both broke my heart and on top of that happily got together bonding over trash talking me. Lovely.

The worst part though, is that Matthew broke up with me because I was stupid and told him I still have feelings for them.

I do. Love is not a thing that is easy to erase. It always stays somewhere deep inside you. Dulled and insignificant but somehow you still care for that person. But I do not _love_ them.

It's Birdie who holds my heart in his hands.

Gott, I sound like a teenage girl. But this is the only way I know to say it even if it's not awesome one bit.

He destroys it. Every time we see each other he's cold like the Canadian winter. And that's insanely freezing. Also, there are Francis and Alfred. So what if Francis and I were best friends since elementary school. I hurt Mattie and now he's hurting me in revenge. He knows roughly everything about me and is now happily using it to make my life living hell. And Alfred. I'm surprised I'm still alive yet though if it wasn't for Feliciano and Ludwig I'm pretty sure he'd shoot me. He isn't hiding with it. He hates me and I have wide spectrum of evidence always with me - mostly on my chest but he also likes to hit the face. And the insults.

It wouldn't hurt half that bad if Mattie as much as attempted to stop them. But he pretends he does not know me and if he has to acknowledge my existence he only glares.

I feel like the most not awesome idiot in the whole world. I finally had such a happy life with Birdie and destroyed it with one stupid comment. That's just like me.

As I said I was just leaving. Lutz made me go to that gathering, I'm not really sure why I even agreed to come. After an hour of being insulted every possible way and receiving death glares or being completely ignored I had had enough. I wanted nothing more than to run away as disgraceful as it is.

And then I saw the red car.

It would have hit them, I knew it. There had been no way for them to run away in time. Also they'd have probably ignored me if I tried to warn them just to make me frustrated.

So I did the only thing I could think of to save them.

I stepped on the piece of metal pushing it to the ground and my car sped right between the red one and the people I cared for the most in the world.

Just as I breathed in relief the red car hit mine. I only saw the seven's curious and a little annoyed at the tires' screeches faces before everything faded to black.

**/txtbreak/**

I woke up with a splitting headache feeling very odd. I really can't describe this feeling. It was not awesome, that I knew for sure. But it was a familiar feeling, that something was wrong, eating away at my mind.

Wherever I was it was dark. I waited for my eyes to adjust and all I could make out was a small room with a window with closed curtains and some beeping machines that annoyed the hell out of me.

I was in a hospital?

Why? I furrowed my brows trying hard to remember what exactly happened to put me here but nothing came to me. The only thing I remembered was a sense of accomplishment that did not tell me anything.

Well, I guessed I just had to wait for someone to tell me.

I looked around for a button to alert the nurse that I need help with my headache and some information. Finding one quite nearby I pressed it and hoped the nurse won't be a bitch for calling her in the night. That'd kill my head.

Surprisingly soon not only a nurse but also a doctor came into my room. I had to squeeze my eyes shut when they switched the light on in the room and it took me some time to adjust again. When I could finally see everything without my eyes watering I looked at the ones that came into my room.

The doctor was a young man, I'd say in early thirties. He had large bags under his eyes but he was looking at me intensely and a little excitedly with a friendly smile.

'I'm sorry for the illumination. I'm doctor Harrison. How do you feel, sir?' He said, the excitement and, for some reason, relief, present in his voice.

'I have a horrible headache.' I was surprised to hear my voice rasp. 'Have you got anything for that, doc?'

He nodded and the nurse quickly went to fetch the medicine.

'Anything besides that?' He asked gently.

'No, I feel fine. Say, doctor... what exactly happened to put me here?' I needed to know. It was distressing to suddenly wake up in a hospital room not knowing why.

He was silent for a moment and the nurse came back with the medicine for me. I was relieved to get rid of that splitting pain.

'You were in a car crash.' The doctor finally said and his words destroyed a dam in my brain. Memories flooded and suddenly I could remember being at the party and wanting to escape Francis, Alfred and my Matthew's hatred, going to the car and... the red car speeding towards my family.

We were not connected by blood, well, besides Ludwig, but I considered them my family nonetheless.

'Oh...' I breathed lamely, stupidly blinking my eyes.

'Yes. You seem to remember everything, right?' The doctor asked.

'Yeah... uh... are they okay?' I asked and he lifted one brow, surprised with my question.

'Yes, everyone is fine, don't worry about that' He paused for a second. 'You probably wonder how bad your injuries were.' Not really but it would be nice to know. I nodded. 'You had a broken leg in three places, seven broken ribs, one of which punctured your lung, we barely made it in time to save you, and a serious concussion.' Well that certainly justiced my headache. 'You were bleeding profusely from you liver and the metal barely missed your intestine. The operation lasted for around five hours.'

'How long I was asleep?' I asked inwardly cringing. Hearing about my injuries made every of the mentioned places tingle unpleasantly.

'Three months.' Came his reply. At first I only stared at him, eyes wide, mouth agape, utterly shocked.

'Come again?'

'Three months. Your injuries were really serious, there was a high possibility you wouldn't make it.' He explained while the nurse checked the beeping machines around me.

'Three months...'

'Yes. Your brother, Mr. Ludwig, comes here almost every day. Do you want me to contact him now?' He asked. I nodded numbly, still in shock and a little hazy.

He nodded. 'Okay, I'll go call him right away. If you need anything just say so.' And then he was gone.

So Lutz came here almost every day for three months? Wow. I did not think he'd do such a thing for me. It must've cost him a lot of time. And nerves. He was probably worried sick.

The nurse gently asked if I needed anything. I shook my head no and she left the room reminding me about the button.

I was left to my thoughts. I was touched Ludwig would come here just to see me and shocked that I was asleep for so long.

I couldn't help but think about Matthew though. Was he worried? Did he even care? Or was he happy? A bit extreme but... Alfred and Francis certainly were overjoyed I ended up here for so long. Antonio and Lovino probably didn't even care. My ties with Antonio loosened when Francis went hating me and Lovino took Matthew's side like a best friend would do. Not that he shouldn't, it _had_ been all my fault.

I sighed. Suddenly the door to my room opened again and I turned my head to see Ludwig and Feliciano standing in the doorway. Was I really thinking for so long?

'Bruder.' Ludwig breathed upon seeing me conscious and entered the room, Feli behind him, to sit at my bedside. He then proceeded to take my hand and squeeze it, as if to testify if it was really me, awake.

'Ludwig. Feli.' I smirked.. 'Awesome seeing you here.'

His lips twitched and Feliciano giggled, finally I got that scared expression off his face. He looked much better smiling.

'H-how do you feel?' Ludwig asked. I lifted a brow at his stutter and responded with

'I'm okay. Awesome, even, since that nice nurse gave me something for headache.' He frowned hearing that.

'Relax, West. I really am okay. I mean, after such a long time it'd be weird if I didn't.' I laughed but they both continued looking worried. 'Stop that. I said I'm okay.'

'Yeah, now.' Ludwig grunted. 'But who could say that when you were half dead for the first week, and then when you wouldn't wake up no matter what. They told us... that you may even stay in coma for the rest of your life.' His voice wavered and Feliciano sniffed beside him. I suddenly felt bad for making them worried.

'Heh. But here I am - wide awake and all healed nice.' I said grinning. They were quiet before Feli spoke.

'Gilly. How did it happen?' he sniffed with tears in his eyes. 'We were so worried!'

'Eh... well... it would've hit you.' I explained lamely. And only because these two were my closest family, They stood for me when the rest would berate me so I figured I could tell them. Feliciano sniffed harder and hugged me tightly. It didn't hurt and I laughed quietly. Even Ludwig looked ready to cry. 'Speaking of which. Everyone is okay, right?' I asked knowing Ludwig wouldn't lie to make me feel better or anything. I couldn't be sure with the doctor although I supposed he was a nice guy. At least he told me exactly what happened to me without sugaring it unnecessarily.

Ludwig nodded.

'Right!' Feliciano exclaimed letting go of me an sitting up straight. 'I'll need to phone Lovi and Toni, they were worried sick!' He was going to say something more but halted seeing my facial expression. I guess it was as disbelieving as I felt. 'They were!' He defended them.

'Yes,' Lutz confirmed. 'but not as much as Francis and his cousins. All three were really scared for you, especially Matthew.'

I couldn't help but chuckle humorlessly.

'I know you're trying to make me feel better but there is really no need to lie. First of all they all hate me. Francis and I were best friends but as much as we were close he now wants nothing to do with me. Don't even start on Alfred, he was against me since the beginning. As for Matt. Well... I don't know how he really feels but for now he just pretends I don't even exist. The three of them worrying over me is like snow in July in Germany. Not possible.' I said and Ludwig sighed sadly.

'Bruder...'

'But that was three months ago, Gilly. How do you know their feelings didn't change when you were here?' Feliciano piped in.

I just shook my head. False hope was worst than real hatred. Disappointment hurt much worse. I couldn't believe that they'd change their opinion of me just because I ended up in the hospital. If they didn't...

'I'll believe when I see. I'm not up for a disappointment like that.' Feliciano went back to being sad. I needed to distract them somehow from that gloomy atmosphere.

'So! How have you two been the three months?' I changed the subject. Knowing exactly what I was talking about Ludwig went all red and Feliciano immediately perked up.

'Oh wonderful!' He exclaimed happily. 'Luddy almost proposed to me, you know?' He bounced on his chair excitedly.

'I did no such thing!' Ludwig protested embarrassed.

'Yeah, right, continue, Feli.' I chuckled mercilessly.

'So, once, we were laying on the bed, (he lets me sleep with him without complaints now, you know!) Luddy hugged me and asked me to always be together, whatever happens! It was so sweet!' the little Italian squealed and I laughed. Ludwig was sitting with his head in his hands, beet red even on his ears and neck.

'See, Feli, just wait 'till he actually proposes! I bet he already has a ring!' I laughed making the Italian jump onto "Luddy" and kiss him.

'You really have a ring for me?' He asked excitedly.

'Now now, Feli, even if he has you shouldn't know that so stop this inquiring! Better go to sleep.' I added seeing him yawn. After all it _was_ the middle of the night.

'Okay. We'll let you rest for now and we'll be back tomorrow. Sounds good?' Ludwig eagerly jumped on an occasion to change the subject.

'Sounds awesome. Now go before Feli collapses somewhere.' I smiled at them and let them both hug me before I was left alone in my dark hospital room.

So they say... Matthew was worried...

I mulled over this for some time in my head but it was so unlikely that he, his twin and his cousin felt anything but disgust towards me I stopped before my mind started torturing me.

With a sigh I closed my eyes and let the sleep take my consciousness away once again. This time I was going to wake soon though.

I couldn't decide between being happy and scared.

**/txtbreak/**

True to their words Ludwig and Feliciano came the next day around midday. What I didn't expect though was waking to see _four_ faces around me. They didn't notice I'm awake at first so I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep again.

'Is he really okay?' Antonio's hushed voice came.

'So he said.' Ludwig muttered. 'The only thing he complained about was a headache.'

'Well, he certainly looks much better...' The voice wavered a little. Hm… interesting.

'Stop reminding me, idiot. Do you know how hard I tried to get rid of mental images of all that blood and bones? I've never seen anyone's whole mutilated body covered in blood, mixed with glass and metal and I never want to see it again. I had nightmares for an entire damned month.' Lovino growled.

'Lovi.' Feliciano whimpered. His brother only sniffed and muttered something. I decided enough is enough and startled them saying

'Was it really that bad?' Opening my eyes I could see all of them jumping in their seats.

'Gilbert!' Ludwig exclaimed with a start.

'What? I don't remember anything besides a red car, I wouldn't know.' I grinned.

'Since when are you awake?' Antonio exclaimed.

'Since a couple of minutes. Hey Tonio,' I added looking at him 'what are you actually doing here?'

He cringed looking guilty and embarrassed. It was uncalled for, what I said, but hey. I was upset.

Surprisingly enough it was Lovino who answered.

'We are here, fucktard, because we are _worried_ about your stupid ass. Honestly, who in their right mind would get into such a mess?!' He said.

'Anyone, I guess, who saw some idiot about to kill his whole family.' I shot back (adding "And the love of his life." in my mind) annoyed but touched nonetheless. After all it was the fiery Italian who hated all Germans, here stating he was worried about me, and after hurting Matthew.

And here my good mood went down the drain…

'Y-your family?' Antonio repeated utterly shocked.

'Yes, moron, my family. That's what I consider all of you.' I said slowly like to a three years old child.

Antonio sniffed really wetly and jumped to hug me to himself tightly. I hissed. Seems like I wasn't really that well healed, after all. Antonio shot back immediately and started apologizing.

'Shut up.' I breathed without venom. 'I'm okay.' They looked extremely not convinced but I ignored them all. What did they know anyway?

'So you going to fill me in with what's going on around?' I demanded before they could voice their doubts.

'Well, nothing really new. Besides maybe... Francis kind of… has a thing with his wine. And Alfred is really too quiet. And…'

'Not about this. Not yet.' I pleaded. 'I… I don't want to deal with this right now.'

'But-'

'Just let him rest, Antonio.' Ludwig came to my rescue. I shot him a grateful glance. 'Tonio sighed but let it go.

The rest of their visit they just sat and talked about anything and everything really managing to take my mind off of the painful thoughts. I was feeling much better when the doctor came to tell them the visiting hours are over.

'Do you want us to come tomorrow too?' Feli asked hopefully and I grinned.

'I see you were missing my awesomness! Sure, come, I'm not going anywhere!' They smiled at me, even Lovino was in a quite good mood, and they left the room.

**/txtbreak/**

'Gil… I'm sorry but you need to face it – they want to see you.' I sighed at Antonio's words.

'I know… it's just that I…'

'We understand. But they really changed, they don't hate you anymore. They want to come and talk. But you must let them. Believe me it'll only hurt more the longer you keep running away. Matthew is depressed and so are you. We can see it clearly.'

I uttered another sigh. 'Okay. But I don't want to deal with Alfred and Francis alone. And only after them I will talk with Matt. Deal?'

They had a look of pity on their faces and I frowned at them. I could sacrifice my pride only because it was them but I felt serious regret seeing them pitying me. What the fuck!

'It's okay, Gilbert, we won't leave as long as Francis and Alfred will be here. Okay?' my little brother soothed.

I huffed and fell on the pillows piled up behind me. 'How much time 'till the visiting hours are over?' I asked them.

'Four hours.' Ludwig responded eying me suspiciously. 'Why?'

'Come on, lets get it over with. If they can… Would you phone them to come over?'

Antonio smiled brightly. 'That's the spirit! I'll go call Francis right away, okay?'

'Okay, okay. Just hurry up.' I grumbled. Antonio quickly fished the cell from his pocket and left the room to call the two.

He came back after a few minutes. 'They'll be here in twenty minutes.' he announced. I didn't really want to meet them, just in case you didn't know that yet, so I waited for them rather tense. Also I was happy these four was to stand by me the whole time. I really didn't trust Francis and Alfred at all.

True to their words both came inside twenty minutes later. Somehow I felt immensely better seeing them as tense, if not more, than me.

'Hi, freaks.' I tried to make my voice as relaxed as possible. They looked really funny which made it considerably easier.

'Mon ami, 'ow are you feeling?' Francis said slurring a little. So Antonio said he had a thing with wine lately.

'Decent.' I replied curtly. Well I was allowed to act childishly being in hospital. I decided to make it as hard for them as possible.

'That's good...' Francis muttered and looked around awkwardly.

'Yeah... you looked pretty nasty... then. I mean you almost died and stuff and...' Alfred tried hard to think of what was proper to say. He was failing miserably, as always. 'I-I mean... ' Here happened a long awkward pause. 'Mattiesaidyoudidthisonpurpose.' He finally got out.

I looked at him in silence long enough to make him even more uncomfortable wondering how the hell Matthew knew. 'I did.' I finally confirmed. The four that was with me previously only sighed; they already knew.

Francis and Alfred looked shocked. 'W-why?' Francis stammered. 'Y-you tried to commit s-suicide? Is that it? Please tell me it's not, please!' He started crying, dear God. Have I been too cruel for him? He was always... tender.

'It's not. For God's sake stop crying Francis!' I hollered and winced. Feli put his hand on my shoulder.

'Then... why?' Alfred pressed. I crossed my arms.

'Not now.'

'Gilbert-'

'Not. Now.'

They all fell silent. I was sure Alfred would press some more but there were four people who's expression said "ask more on this and you're dead". I was immensely happy that I decided to give up my pride for their presence.

'So...'

**/txtbreak/**

The visit lasted for around two hours. I forgave them because 1) they were clearly regretful and 2) Lovino said Matt was really worried about that.

I was awfully bold not wanting to see them ASAP. Apparently the news of me awakening quickly spread to everyone interested and all wanted to visit. Shocking, right? I never thought I'd be more popular like that just because of landing in a hospital. Anyway, Lovino talked to Matthew and he cried. Not awesome.

He was making me guilty, dammit!

But now that Alfred and Francis came and clearly stated there will be no more trouble on their part (Feliciano burst and told them why I had gotten into the crash which made Alfred even more uncomfortable and regretful while Francis just broke down crying although he tried really hard to stop and apologize to me, I had to console _him_) I had one more visit to dread - I promised to see Matt as soon as those two were taken care off.

He was going to visit me the following day. It was Saturday that day so he had the whole time in the world for that.

To be honest I was scared of that visit even more than of seeing those two idiots.

He wasn't there when I woke up. The Italian brothers were. Feli smiled brightly and Lovino said 'Be nice, bastardo.' Before they wished us good luck and departed to bring Matthew inside.

He looked worse than his siblings; he was literally shaking.

I didn't smile. I was fucking shaking too.

He sank into the chair beside the bed I mutely invited him to and sat there looking at me with big, watery purple eyes.

I could only stare back.

'TALK!' Both of us jumped as Lovino hollered through the door before Feliciano smiled at us encouragingly through the glass dragging him away.

I turned to Matthew, my hands tightly gripping the white bedspread, his long fingers restlessly playing with the hem of his red hoodie.

'So... how have you been?' I started lamely. Not awesome but it was the only thing I could think of under current circumstances.

'I-i've b-been good.' Matthew said barely detectably. He stammered, a sign of high distress, normally he was very confident, if quiet. 'Y-you?...'

'I've been good too...' Old Man Fritz this was a disaster! 'I-i mean I was kind of out of it but now everything's fine so...'

'A-are you sure? When they took you out of the w-wreck... i-it was the m-most h-horrible sight I've ever s-seen... and the operation b-barely s-succeded...' The tears almost fell, he looked traumatized.

'Well, I'm okay now, really.' I said and startled him by sitting up straight to prove my words. Admittedly it wasn't quite that comfortable but I managed without Ludwig's helping arm behind my back. Well of course, I'm awesome, after all.

He at first moved to stop me but froze and backed away, his hands gripping at the crumpled, red material once again. He didn't even want to touch me. I gathered the courage with an inhale.

'Come on I won't bite you or break if you do that.' I said quite fond of his gentle touches. He reached hesitantly and arranged the pillows more comfortably keeping his hand on my back for support.

I sighed falling onto them. 'Thank you, Mattie.'

'A-anytime.' He smiled gently and it immediately lit up his features.

We sat there together in silence, more comfortable than at first but still awkward.

Finally, it was him who broke it. 'You did this to protect us, d-didn't you?' He asked quietly, the small smile gone.

'How do you know?' I asked back confirming his question with a nod.

'I've been watching you.' He admitted with a pale blush. I gaped at him in shock.

'You? Watching me? For all I know you were trying hard to erase me from your life!' It was shocking. Every time I looked at him he ignored me or glared and here he states he was "watching me"?

'No, never!' Matthew exclaimed lividly. 'I'd never want to-! I mean-! I-... Maple...' I just stared at him 'till he blushed wildly, clearly not knowing how to say what he wanted.

'So... you didn't want to cut me out of your life?' I prodded gently.

'Y-yes. I-i'm so s-sorry I a-acted like that I-i-'

'It's okay, you had the rights... I shouldn't have said I still had feelings for them. I don't!' I assured quickly seeing his expression. 'I really don't I swear! I meant I... care for them like for a family but I'm a fucking idiot and it came out bad way. I'm... sorry.' I whispered finishing my confession. Now it was all his decision. I heard the heart monitor beside me speed up.

Matthew was quiet for a second and I didn't dare to look at him.

Finally he sniffed wetly and suddenly I was enveloped in a gentle hug. 'Gilbert I-i'm so s-s-sorry! I-i didn't even g-give y-you time t-to ex-xplain y-your w-words and I h-h-hurt y-you!' I circled my arms around his well muscled and yet seemingly fragile body and returned the hug. He shouldn't be apologizing, it was _me_ who hurt _him_!

'Mattie don't apologize! It was me who told you stupid things, you had the full right to act like you had! Don't cry anymore, Mattie, Birdie. It's okay!' I tried to soothe him. He lifted his head to look at me. I gave him a smile.

'B-but -'

'No buts. I love _you_, Birdie. Only you.'

'I-i was a d-dick to you!'

'Because I was an un-awesome idiot.'

'G-gilbert!' He exclaimed shocked.

'What?'

'... Je t'aime.' He whispered blushing madly grinning.

I my own smile widened. 'So that means you'll take me back?' I asked hopefully.

'Yes!' Matthew exclaimed happily hugging me tighter. It hurt just a little but his arms were too dear to push him away just because it was uncomfortable. I've been waiting for much too long to feel those arms around me again.

'That's awesome. I missed you, Birdie.' I said hugging him back.

'I missed you too, Pooh-Bear.' He mocked me with a beautiful smile that lit up his whole face, making his eyes shine and a blush cover his cheeks.

After that we talked comfortably or sat in and equally nice silence. Confirming that my body hardly hurt anymore Matthew made himself comfortable beside me on the hospital bed so we could be closer and the time flew much too fast. It was a surprise to us when we realized how late it had gotten and that he had to go home. He went somewhat reluctantly with a promise to come back as soon as possible.

I hadn't had such a good night rest since forever.

**/txtbreak/**

Since then my life started looking up in every way.

It was a true miracle but I haven't been thrown out of my job for a four-month absence. They understood a traffic accident. Geez, who would've thought?

My relationship with Ludwig has strengthened because of the whole situation. Naturally, so has the one I had with Feliciano. Antonio remained my best friend and even Lovino came to tolerate me, not to say befriend. They were all a huge support during my time in hospital and rehabilitation (not using previously shredded muscles ends painfully and I hate being crippled). Then there are Alfred and Francis. We are... friends, kind of, but what we had with Francis was never really repaired. I'm suspicious of them sometimes even today...

And the best thing about my life - me and Matthew got back together and now we're living in a nice, rented apartament keeping his dog. He has been the biggest support I had ever and he has always been there for me, whatever happened. He actually said he was scared he could, God forbid, lose me again, this time permanently, so he took to spending all of his free time with me, keeping an eyes on my awesome self in case I had something stupid in mind again.

I can't say I don't like it whatsoever, even if he likes to mock me all the time. Seriously, don't ever fall for that angelic looks of his, he's really a witty little troll.

On his next birthday I'm thinking on proposing to mein Vögelchen.

That though is still in the phase of planning/possibilities so don't tell Birdie.

Well, we're having a family dinner shortly at our place so I'm now off to help Mattie with the cooking or maybe setting the table.

I do _something_ around the house too.

Tchüss

Gilbert

**/txtbreak/**

**So here it is. I've been writing this story for a couple of months which is a lot for me. Schools and the likes, I guess. And the fact that I've been reading a ot of good things which made me kind of self-conscious about my own writing. Let's face it, it's not the best. Anyway I'm really grateful for the fact that you bothered to read and would be even more if you spared me a minute to leave a review.**


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